Updated: Dec 23, 2019
I’ve written before about how God used something awful, watching my mom suffer and die from cancer, for good in my life. I think this is my one of my favorite attributes of God. He redeems. He redeemed my pain and brought so much good into my life by revealing Himself to me through the heartache and many, many tears. And He is redeeming my once weak and doubting heart, and raising in its place a faith that is anchored and secure. Of course, I still don’t look at myself and feel like faith comes easily for me. If some people have faith without entertaining much doubt, it seems God’s grace somehow allows my faith to develop as I wade through entire oceans of it.
There is a sign on my wall that a dear friend of mine gave me several years ago. It reads, "Nothing is Wasted." This sign reminds me that God is working all things together for my good and His glory. Perhaps there is greater glory for God in the redemption of my story, than there would have been without the struggle. Only God could take my pride and exceptional doubt, and build a foundation of faith from the awful loss of losing mom. Maybe my faith could have grown from receiving tangible blessings – and maybe that would have made more logical sense: “See how faithful God has been in providing for my every desire!” (How part of me wishes that could have been my story!) Instead my story rings, “See how faithful my God has been through pain and loss. See how He revealed Himself to me when I didn’t believe. See how sure I am of His goodness, when my circumstances have cried of despair. And oh, how I have grown to love Him so - and know His love for me is greater still.” If that doesn’t make you stop and take a breath, then you probably need to read it again.
Nothing is wasted.
I don't know what trial you are facing, what formidable mountains lie up ahead, or what valley you have just walked out of...but I know who God is. And as one whose circumstances didn't change - the mountains remained and the valleys were long - you can believe me when I say, no matter what twists your story has made or is about to make, He is enough. He has purposes for your weaknesses, failures, and for your pain - He has plans to redeem. I have learned that the answer to every struggle I face is to get my eyes off my struggle and off myself, and onto Him. Knowing who God is becomes my source of hope for everything.